


Sympathy Pains

by Evil_Little_Dog



Series: Little Things [107]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: Gen, Humor, Implied Relationships, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-26
Updated: 2012-11-26
Packaged: 2017-11-19 13:54:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/573976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evil_Little_Dog/pseuds/Evil_Little_Dog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary:  Roy meets the boys at a bar with some news.<br/>Disclaimer:  The last thing anyone should think is that I own anything on this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sympathy Pains

The tavern was crowded, and noisy, but somehow, the two young men at the table stood out from everyone else in it. Roy nodded as he walked over to them, pulling out a chair. “Edward. Alphonse. Good to see you both again.” 

“Good to see you, too, Brigadier General,” Alphonse said politely, while Edward snickered. 

“What?” Roy narrowed his eyes, taking his seat. 

“The way you’re waddling around, somebody’d think you’re the one carrying the baby.”

“Just because my feet are so swollen,” Roy protested. 

“I’m sorry, carrying what baby?” Alphonse asked, looking between them. 

Wicked delight showing in his eyes, Edward chortled, “He’s doing that sympathetic pregnancy thing.” 

“Really?” A grin stretched Alphonse’s mouth. “Congratulations, sir!” He offered his hand, and Roy shook it. 

“Thank you, Alphonse. I knew I could count on you expressing your pleasure in Riza’s pregnancy.” 

Alphonse turned to Edward and nudged him hard. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Hey, I found out the hard way.” Edward screwed up his face. “I saw them kissing and him,” his finger wagged across the table, “rubbing her belly.” Somehow, his face contorted even more. “It was so gross!”

“I cannot believe you have children yourself,” Roy said, as the waitress appeared to take their orders. 

“My kids are cute,” Edward hooked a thumb at his chest. “Yours will have absolutely no luck if they come out looking like you.”

“Brother,” Alphonse sighed, rubbing his temples. 

Roy gave the waitress a charming smile. “I’d like a beer,” he said. “And whatever it looks like, yes, he,” he waved at Edward, “is old enough to drink.” 

Edward sneered but ordered his own beer, Alphonse nodding that he wanted one, too. The waitress smiled and left them to get their order. Once she’d returned with their drinks, and Roy had his first sip of the lager, he turned his attention to Alphonse. “So, now that you have my news, what about your own? Are you back in Amestris for good, or will you be returning to Xing?”

Alphonse ducked his head slightly. “I’m still deciding that,” he said, raising his glass as if to hide behind it to give himself more time to answer. 

“Yeah, if his boyfriend will let him come home,” Edward grumbled. 

“Ed!” Alphonse elbowed him, hard enough to make Edward yip in protest. 

Rolling his eyes, Roy reminded himself he’d asked for this meeting when Alphonse was in town. Maybe he should’ve requested it happen at home, where Riza could threaten them all with her pistols and touchy mood – not that he’d ever tell her that her moods were touchy. Or he could let Alphonse kill Edward…but Riza would probably hurt him for that, too, because Edward’s wife would find out he was involved. Somehow. 

Roy sighed, sucking down half of his beer. Yeah, it was going to be one of those afternoons. The squabbling rose in intensity, making him think maybe he should just pack it in and waddle home to his wife, and let her rub his feet. Or he could rub hers. Whichever. “Well,” he said, “this has been very entertaining, but I have a lovely wife waiting for me.” Pushing back his chair, he wasn’t surprised the brothers barely noticed beyond Alphonse’s nod and smile, and quick, “I’ll be in touch, sir,” and Edward’s snarling face, almost turned his way. 

Roy said to himself as he left them to it, “I hope to hell we don’t have boys.”


End file.
